What's Wrong with A Child?

On November 11 the NYT prominently featured an article that prominently featured ADHD and depression the title was "What's Wrong with A Child? Psychiatrists Often Disagree" by Benedict Carey.

While this article raises the problem and raises an eyebrow about the escalation of diagnoses in children and the phenomenon of children with multiple diagnoses, it doesn't answer the question of why, or attempt to solve the problem. Dr. Lara Honos-Webb in The Gift of ADHD and Listening to Depression vehemently articulates that what you focus on you get more of. If you tell a child he has a deficit disorder is it a suprise that that child continues to get worse? Her approach not only explains the phenomenon of escalating diagnoses (epidemiologically and additional diagnoses for one child) but also offers an alternative. Translate symptoms into gifts and create a positive self-fulfilling prophesy rather than a negative one.

Here's the link.
(http://www.nytimes.com/2006/11/11/health/psychology/11kids.html?

what do you think? Post your comments here.

www.visionarysoul.com

Comments

[Cara Fletcher]

I'm a mother of a son and I am afraid of the perspective of some depression when he is growing and I am trying to find as more as possible to know what is the best treatment with medication if something happens because depression can be very harmful.

[Cara Fletcher]

I'm a mother of a son and I am afraid of the perspective of some depression when he is growing and I am trying to find as more as possible to know what is the best treatment with medication if something happens because depression can be very harmful.

[Lara]

Here is a link to an interview with Dr. Ed Hallowell, who addressed the issue of ADHD and Depression.

http://www.byoaudio.com/play/WB8b43WX

[Scott Becker]

This is a fantastic forum. Although now under control at 46 years old, I have been suffering from depression all my life. Back in the days when I was a kid these kind of things were not really diagnosed. Now my girlfriend's son who is 9 has been diagnosed with ADHD. I want nothing more than to make him feel just like everyone else. Unlike the way they treated me, I realize that it's not his fault. I guess what I am saying is that I agree with your post, the best thing that I find is just to treat as if he didn't have ADHD and to build up his self esteem.

[Kenny]

I think this is an important point. The 'deficit model' has many problems with it and perpetuates shame and negativity. I strongly support looking for the 'gifts' within.

[Elon Block]

I just found this forum and wanted to share the experiences of my recent experiences with my grandson and his school.

My grandkid who is 5 was having some trouble in school. My wife went with her son in law and her daughter to meet with the teachers, and the principal, while I was watching the 5 year old and his brother.

I am really glad my wife decided to go to the meeting. Because she is a really good listener, and knows how to ask the questions. After about 30 minutes of hearing the parents side of the story. The principal reluctantly agreed to move my grandson to a new classromm, with a new teacher. The reason for the reluctance revolved around it being the beginning of the year. And not wanting to disrupt the childs new friendships.

My point in sharing this is.I find it interesting that many school officials knee jerk reaction seems to be prescribing some sort of drug. Like Ritalin.

I don't claim to be an expert in parenting, or granparenting. However I find it hard to believe that drugs are often the first choice in treating a hyper, or unruly child.

Because it isn't aways a matter of "what's wrong with the child"? Could there be a possibility that there may be a personality conflict with the teacher? It happens with adults, all the time. And IMHO, kids are just basically smaller versions of adults.

I believe there is a place for treatment of emotional issues with drugs. But doesn't it make sense to listen to the child also. And see if there is another solution first. Instead of automatically prescribing drugs as the cure all?

If my wife hadn't attended the meeting and strongly suggested the new classroom. The school was well on it's way to recommending some sort of unecessary drug treatment for this child.

Back to the original story. Within 3 days my grandson was transferred to the new class. And immediately his attitude, and school work improved considerably. And the variable was changing his teacher.

Things that make you hmmmmm???

[Lara Honos-Webb]

How wonderful to see the feedback here. I love the story about changing a kid's classroom and seeing dramatic improvements. Other stategies I have seen have dramatic results include:
1) reflect the child's emotions back to him or her and say "It's ok to be mad, it's just not ok to hit." Using emotional reflections as a first approach to behavioral problems takes about 2 weeks to 2 months to work, but then you will see behavior change as the child stops acting out the emotion and learns to communicate it.
2) instead of getting mad at kids for what they are doing, "Stop hitting!" give them gentle guidance and coaching in what they should be doing "we touch each other lovingly." When our first line response is anger or frustration and we raise our voice telling our kids what not to do, they don't learn the basic skills of good behavior or how to study in school.
Connection before Consequences and Coaching before Consequences are some catchphrases you can remember. I've seen these work well.
visionarysoul.com
Dr. Lara Honos-Webb

[Peacock and Paisley Natural ADHD Cure No Drugs]

A great thing to keep in mind when helping kids or adults who have ADHD or ADD is that many of them are severely affected by what they eat and by what they are exposed to in their surroundings, biochemically-speaking. It's like giving crack to a kid and expecting them to behave nicely -- not going to happen! Life can dramatically improve by removing "allergens". I also refer to these interfering foods and chemicals as "kiddie crack". Kids usually love the foods that make them feel "high", but that's when they start causing serious problems. I've even had an adult colleague unintentionally completely disrupt business meetings with ADHD spurts brought on by of all things M&Ms.